I was first introduced to bondage and BDSM overall via the movie “The Cell” by Tarsem. Its a visual feast exploring some extreme hook suspension in a key scene, its an erotic taste not many openly explore and definitely hits a squick spot of extreme graphic quality that can be too much. I appreciate it from a visual sense but physically its never been my thing for multiple reasons. Both rope and hook suspension explore Zen trance through pain in very different ways.
Rope bondage originated from Japanese military usage to keep prisoners from any vague form of escape, it just accidentally happened to have a big kink factor to it that is both erotic and soothing. The only difference between the brutality of hard torture vs enjoyed sensuality is the choice of consent. That makes all the difference. And so the hard art evolved into current times and is renewed into another art form entirely.
Hook suspension is a wholly different art form, also respecting rules of consent, its much more tricky to get into then rope as its practice is far more specialized.
Its funny and sad at the same time how we tend to feel guilty about having time off and having breathing space for ourselves. When i’m not working it takes me a bit of time to unwind and decompress, pretty much to re find my sense of humour, patience and more relaxed breathing. Its best done away from people and tends to work with lack of noise of most kinds, loud music being a daily staple in the exotic dance world along with endless chatter. A quiet mind better survives under pressure and stress.
Its ridiculous to feel like its essential to justify time off yet without it temper begins to flare, sarcasm begins to boil over and self censorship disappears. Its like a warning bell of what worse fallout can pop up. Physical and emotional endurance are vital things to remain in balance to stay functioning and sane in life and work. Theres no owners manual for life with the jobs we choose.
For some reason I’m eternally fascinated by Sailor Moon as a character and transformational being. She’s so iconic yet simple, elegant yet strong. Immediately recognizable in her early style yet more unknown in her later incarnations. It would be super interesting to try to create a transformational costume that encompassed her earlier power then morphed into her later strength.
I’m finding my eye of creative freedom is definitely jumping into higher gear these days. Everything from still images to short film, things are getting more solid vs the more uncertain understanding of what was possible earlier in my career. Experience is a powerful teacher as is seeing and always studying different visual resources. The developing comfort in knowing what works and what doesn’t and being more sure of going with gut instinct and taking creative risk vs playing it safe. Its a fine line but ultimately it pays for itself long term. Frightening and expensive short term but guaranteed payoff long term.
I have done several exotic showgirl contests over the last 2 years and have an interest in seeing what creative expression thats not stereotypical stripping in style can do. I come from the world of ballet and classic Hollywood films where more extreme showmanship is the name of the game. In stage performance I find myself as yet still relatively new to the full possibilities that are open to me. There seems to be more connection to circus then any other area of performance for me.
I’ve never competed exclusively for burlesque and so know nothing of any exact burlesque venues or long standing festivals besides ones like Vancouver and Edmonton that are relatively close to home. Visiting the Burlesque museums in Vegas would be amazing. Someday!
Dropped economy definitely forces priority of spending on vital and long term value items and projects. Focus on print media and short demo film is a big priority for this coming year, jumping the box into more extreme visuals and performance possibility.
More photography exploration is in order. Working with different photographers and in more challenging settings and concepts. A serious outdoor fire shoot in Yellowknife would be amazing but would absolutely require a spotter to make sure everything was sound and not about to whisk in a different flammable direction. Along with performance stills a raw promo shoot for one of my favourite locations Harleys Hardrock Saloon in Yellowknife.
Admittedly I’m utter crap at maintaining regular posting habits. Work is a large distraction and the need for a mental break from it. Also the crap habit of locking myself out of my own tech which is always brilliant. And I find it a challenge to expand on thoughts when I’m tired or distracted vs go into chill mode. Something that definitely needs working on. Also helps with non Shaw WiFi available.